|Posted by Angie Merriam on September 5, 2012 at 4:15 PM|
It seems that the past year has been less than stellar. Nothing traumatic, like a death in the family, but a series of shitty circumstances keep creeping up and stressing me out! The constant ups and downs have kept me from going home for quit a while. It was also those ups and downs that sent me home recently.
I called the little town of Klamath Falls my home until I was 21 years old. I was born and raised there and hated it with my entire soul! The brown landscape that was void of trees made the Klamath Basin revolting, at least I thought so as a kid.
Beyond the unsightly landscape, there was nothing to do in that po-dunk town. No nearby cities. No real malls for shopping. I yearned to experience city life.....concerts, theater, bright lights and a big city! I didn't care for hunting, fishing, camping, and 4H. I swore I would never raise my kids in that place. I was convinced a town like that left kids with nothing to do but get drunk and/or high. There was nothing else to keep kids busy. So, when the chance presented itself, I bolted out of the town that had been my home my entire life. I made my way to the city!
Over the years, as I have aged, I have slowly moved further away from that city that I craved as a teenager. I rarely go into the city and don't recall ever going to the "theater". Life near the city, I have learned, is faster than life in a small town. Everyone is in a hurry to do everything. Life rushes by you in the city. That life I yearned for, ran to, have loved and lived for the past 13 years has worn me down. For the first time ever, I wanted to go home.
This time I saw those brown mountains that surround my home town as beautiful, not repulsive. Granted, trees were in limited supply, and the ground was not covered in green, but the land was beautiful in its own way. I drove through town showing my children all the places I had lived, where I had gone to school, my bedroom that still displayed my peace, love and happiness drawings on the wall, and where their father and I lived when they were born.
I spent time with family and friends. I visited loved ones who have passed on. I remembered all the things, good and bad, about my life in that town. I re-discovered the town that had pushed me out so long ago. I felt that town welcome me back with open arms. I had a sense of peace while there. For the first time in a long time I was able to relax because I was home. Do I want to "live" there? No, though I am happy to know that home is still there and still feels like home to me. Sometimes, when life gets tough, you just need to go home, regardless of your age. Nothing feels as good as being welcomed home.
Categories: Life and Stuff